By Dennis Stamper
Evolutionary scientists tell us that the control and utilization of fire played a pivotal role in human evolution. Fire provided warmth, the cooking of food and protection from predators. It led to increased brain size and the deepening of social connections. Eventually, fire began to possess deep sacred and ceremonial significance.
The fire had to be carefully tended and fed and when the group was forced to move from one place to another due to increased threats or depletion of resources, the live embers of the living fire needed to be carried with them. Ancient people developed methods for carrying fire using containers like animal horns or fire pots to transport burning coals from one place to another.
The “Fire Carrier” was a person or group entrusted with the sacred task of carrying the fire, and with it the continuity of sustenance, safety, and community. The fire itself, and the act of carrying it, held deep spiritual and cultural significance. Fire Carrier was an honored and trusted role.
I have been thinking about the ancient Fire Carriers a great deal lately. I am fortunate to share friendship and meaningful conversation with many fellow elders from across the country and other parts of the world. The overwhelming majority of us seem to feel like an overwhelmed minority. Although we suspect that this may not be as true as it seems, it is a disempowering conclusion that we must work hard to resist.
Some call it “the dark night of the soul” or even “the dark night of the species soul”. The gentle fire that sustained and fed us, that offered us safety and belonging, that brought us and held us together feels under attack and in danger of being replaced by a raging fire of destruction. Fire can draw us closer in community but it can also send us fleeing the conflagration and hardening our modes of perceived self-protection.
Historians, scientists, and even theologians remind us that this is, more or less, just the way life goes. Things come together and then they fall apart. And given a chance and the right environment, they then come back together in some new, often creative configuration.
So what is our role and task as elders in times like these? How do we keep from retreating to our porches and patios and leaving the work to others? After all, a convenient argument could be made that it just may take more years than I still have left in my quiver, and I do tire more easily these days.
But then I remember the Fire Carriers of old and the sacred and important role they filled. If we ever are to find our way through this darkness and once again sit together around the gentle flame that nourishes and protects us all, someone will need to carry the embers of the fire. Someone will need to faithfully guard and feed the most life sustaining qualities of what is being threatened. And if we are to once again gather together in sacred community, someone will need to remember the best of who we truly are and the stories we once told. I can think of no more honored and vital role for elders than to be the Fire Carriers of today and I can think of no others more fit for the task.
So how do we do this? How do we become Fire Carriers? First of all, we must do the inner work necessary to provide a safe place for the ember to reside, for this time we will not carry the flame in horns or bowls but in our own heart, soul and life. Just as the Fire Carriers of the past protected and fed the community’s fire, we must protect and feed our own inner fire and that of our community. This may require more time in solitude and reflection and less time on news sites and social media. Our inner fire is often best nurtured by time in nature, meditation, and meaningful ritual and prayer.
But fire carrying cannot be a completely solitary endeavor. We will need the shared strength and support of others, both elders and youngers alike, if we are to keep the fire alive. We will need to gather in circle, perhaps around a fire or candle, to love and laugh and lament. Fortunately, there are organizations like The Center for Conscious Eldering, Sage-ing International, and Elder Action Network, just to name a few, who’s work and gift it is to bring elders together and hold sacred space. We must find, share, and grow in community. And yes, we can develop deep and meaningful relationships in virtual circles as well.
Hopefully we can also find friends and fellow Fire Carriers within hand-clasping and bearhugging distance as well. Seek them out and invite them out. I find my heart deeply comforted by a walk in the woods with a trusted friend and my soul, as well as my stomach, can be richly filled over an unhurried lunch together. If no one immediately comes to mind, you may have to reach out to someone you don’t know as well and that can require you to stretch outside your comfort zone. But let me assure you, you are not alone. There are others—many others.
And finally, seek out the company of younger folks. Many of them are frightened and discouraged as well, and they likely have so much more to lose than we do. After all, my kids are raised now, no one can fire me, and I care very little what others think of me these days. Encourage younger people. Accompany them. When needed, protect them. And the simple truth is, this hoped for coming back together in heart-centered community may well take longer than the time we have remaining. The faithful Fire Carrier must sometimes pass the fire on to someone else, teach them to care for it and with our blessing, trust them to carry it the rest of the way.
May your inner being find nurture and strength. May the company of other wise elders guide, support and inspire you. May we find hope and vision enough to stay the course and fulfill our destiny. May we be today’s Fire Carriers.
Dennis Stamper co-leads Choosing Conscious Elderhood retreats. He is also a certified Sageing Leader. He has worked as a Clinical Social Worker and hospital chaplain for many years. Dennis can be reached at d.stamper@sage-ing.org.
